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Sunday 8 November 2015

Why Europeans Die in Australia

Boyfriend and I went to the beach recently. Watching his flippant disregard for the perils of nature I finally realised, after many years of wondering, why so many Europeans die in Australia.

You see, people who have grown up in Oz are ingrained with a deep, innate Danger instinct. This is a survival necessity, the sole purpose of which is to protect us from a grisly death.

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Europeans - such as Boyfriend - seem to be wholly lacking in this Danger instinct.

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For those planning on visiting Australia for the first time, there’s something you need to understand (if you want to live). Remember that dreadful Will Smith movie, After Earth? The one where everything on the planet has evolved to kill humans?

That is Australia.

You call it Man v Wild? We call it camping.

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